On two separate occasions, working with two completely different clients, I heard these phrases almost verbatim: “I hate them,” “I feel awkward,” and “I have to.”
If you hate something and it makes you feel awkward, why would you “have to” do it?
When we are trying to learn a new skill or trying to learn how to do something better, we often turn towards “the experts” to guide us. Whether we are trying to lose weight, or trying to start a new business, or trying to learn how to be a parent, we turn to those who have done it before us, and look to them for the answers.
Then we take those answers and try to apply them to our lives, and our situations. We try to copy them and do exactly as they did, and hope for success.
Sometimes it works. Sometimes it doesn’t.
Yes, their way worked for them, and it probably worked for others, but that doesn’t mean it’s the only way, and that doesn’t mean that it will work for you.
Notice what key word is in each of those statements?
The word should, or the words should not are judgments and expectations. In each of the scenarios above, that expert is putting their judgments and expectations on you without even knowing you or your situation.
I am not saying that the experts are worthless, but I am saying that you need to apply their advice to your personality and your situation.
Listen to their advice, try it out, and if it doesn’t fit, take it off, or adapt it to fit your needs.
There is no point in beating yourself up because you can’t do it their way. Find your own way.
It's Your Life. Live It Boldly.