Two weeks ago, I was talking to the daughter of my husband’s second cousin. She is 18 and just starting her final year of high school here in France. She desperately wants to move to America and become a graphic animator. She has studied and researched her next steps, but….
“I don’t want to disappoint my parents,” she said to me.
“Who are you living for, yourself or your parents?” I questioned.
Pause. “Myself, but my sister just moved back in and I don’t want to do the same thing. I don’t want to disappoint them.”
It's a situation that many of us can relate to. Some of us have discovered the truth, while others have yet to figure it out.
When we live in order to not disappoint others, we end up disappointing ourselves.
This conversation made me think of the 3 types of lives that Brendon Burchard describes in his book The Charge.
There is the Caged Life. The life you chose because other people think it is best for you. It is a life you lead so that you don’t disappoint others. A life you lead because you might be good at it, but you don’t love it. A life you lead because you have to. A life you lead because you should. It’s a life that you resent.
Second, there is the Comfortable Life. As stated, this life is comfortable. It is neither bad, nor great. It’s just good. Nothing fancy. You go to work, you spend time with family and friends, you do what you need to do, but something is missing. Something is drawing you elsewhere, but you chose not to go there. You stay where you are because it’s comfortable. Why risk it?
Finally, there is the Charged Life. This is a life characterized by high energy, high intensity, and high enthusiasm. It has taken some risks to get you here, but you love everything about it. You are reaching your potential. You are inspired, and inspiring others. You feel alive.
So which life are you leading?
I find it interesting to also think of these three types of lives within the subcomponents of our lives--family, friends, health, work, finances, etc.
If you think of your love life, is it caged, comfortable, or charged?
If you think of your work life, is it caged, comfortable, or charged?
If you think about your social life, is it caged, comfortable, or charged?
What about your health?
What about your financial life?
My move to France definitely gave my life a BIG charge, and now I am trying to continue the momentum as I build my business and meet new people. I am trying to work hard to push myself to continue to grow and not get too comfortable.
As you examine the different areas of your life, ask yourself--am I living caged, comfortable, or charged?
Sometimes the boldest thing you can do is pause long enough to examine your life and ask yourself the tough questions.
It's Your Life. Live It Boldly.
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