Choosing Courage

Today is the first day of the new school year. 

In another year, and in another time, this might not be a big deal. But this year, in our house, and in our time,  it is a very big deal.

Not only did both of my kids miss several months of school last Spring due to the virus, but we also made the decision to change my daughter's school for the new school year. A decision that she resisted for a long time, until we told her that she would have twice as much homework and twice as many school supplies. Then she was thrilled.

This morning, though, she held tight to my hand. She refused to say hello to the few friends that we made over the summer. She held back. A friend whose son is a year older and went through the same scenario the year before came over to say hello. She must have seen the face that I couldn't see while standing right next to her. "Everyone is nervous on the first day, but I know that when you get home today it will have been a great day. You'll see."

As we approached the door her grip got  tighter. 

As we merged even closer to the front of the line to meet and greet her two new teachers, I whispered, "It's almost your turn to tell them your name." Her head turned into my waist and I knew that the tears were coming. 

After telling them her name myself, I gave her a big kiss and hug and left her in the arms of a stranger, tears streaming down her face.  

She chose courage. And she will do so again and again throughout the day. 

As she stands back and observes, as she is likely to do, she will choose the courage to stand outside the group. As she asks her teacher for guidance on what to do, or where to put her school supplies, she will choose the courage of not knowing. As she flips from English to French, and back again, as the day will require of her, she will choose the courage of potentially saying it wrong.  And when I pick her up at the end of the day, exhausted from analyzing the newness of it all, she will choose courage yet again--the courage to put down her mask and be her true self.  

​I think I could learn a lot from her. 

Live. Love. Learn. Lead.

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